From the US to Switzerland

Who are you and where are you from? 
My name is Heidi and I grew up in California in the U.S.A

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Where do you live now?
I now live in the French-speaking region of Switzerland.

Do you live with your family?
I live with my husband and 3-year-old daughter.

How old are you?
35.

Share your reason for leaving your country.
I met and fell in love with my husband, who is Swiss, while backpacking in New Zealand 9 years ago. 

Were the adjustments difficult?
Very difficult. Mostly learning French, but also having to sacrifice friends, family, the Californian sun and American culture (for good or for bad).

What was the immigration process like (visas, work permits, residency, etc.)?
We married in a civil ceremony in Switzerland 9 months after my arrival and decided not to tell friends and family in the US. We planned a large, international wedding in the church in Switzerland 1 ½ years later (no one knew we were already really married). We did this so that I could have a work visa, faster. 

Are you working?

I worked until my daughter was born and decided to stay at home with her for the time being.

What are the pros and cons of living in your new country?
Pros: 

1.) The Swiss have a wonderful quality of life. Living in a smaller, rural area, we benefit from relatively low housing costs, low crime, no traffic, and I am able to stay at home. 

2) Life here is incredibly efficient. Switzerland is organized and the quality of everything is really pretty high. No sloppy, half-done jobs around here. 

3). People seem more informed regarding world issues and less focused on consumerism than Americans in general.
Cons: Weather, people, sense of humor (not) , miss friends and family, foodstuffs, etc. I could go on foever. 

Cons:

1.) I miss the spirit of change and possibility that I took for granted in California. The Swiss seem quite set in their ways and not as likely to try out new ideas or new approaches to everything from throwing a party, to new types of food/restaurants, to staying in contact via the internet. 

2.) I miss the way strangers talk to each other in America. Americans have a certain openness that I find endearing and comfortable. I sometimes find it hard to relax in Swiss society, as most people you see on the streets, in stores or on trains seem to keep to themselves and try hard not to interact with others. 

3.) I miss conversing in my own language, using shared cultural jokes and references that have been built up over years of living in an American culture. I sometimes feel like I am missing a part of my personality when I am speaking in French.

Do you miss 'home'? 
I do miss home, although less and less every year that I am here. 

How often do you visit?
I visit 1 or 2 times per year.  

Any advice to share?
Put all the effort and energy you can into learning the language of the culture in which you find yourself. It’s the only way to really assimilate. Once that is up to speed, make sure you create a life for yourself that is not based entirely on your partner’s life (make your own friends too, discover your own places that you like, create your own self in your new country). Try not to take things too personally. The first years can be a major identity crisis for someone who left their home country and I think it tends to create extra insecurity and sensitivity. It’s easy to overreact to what seems like criticism of your native culture, your new language skills, your overall differences. Trust that with time, it gets easier and you will find your groove in the new culture. 

Any web resources to share?

I wish I had searched the web for resources during my first and second year here when I really needed a peer group that could relate to what I was going through. It as so incredibly hard the first six months to one year. E-mailing or reading about others in the same situation would have been helpful to me.